Saying no is difficult. It is for me, at least. I have always struggled with saying no to toxic people, saying no to tasks I know I shouldn’t be doing, saying no to projects, saying no to commitments, saying no to invitations and the list goes on, but you get the idea.
I can’t say no. Even when I know that I should be saying no, my body betrays me and starts nodding yes and eventually YES comes out of my mouth and I’ve ended up committing to another thing. The very next moment, my mind screams, WHY! I can’t seem to understand why it happened, why did I say yes even when I wanted to say no.
Sometimes I think its because I want to avoid confrontation? Maybe I’m a people pleaser? Perhaps I’m just a guy who lacks the confidence to stand up for myself and says NO.
I’m trying to get into the habit of saying no, I’ve started by limiting social engagements. No agreeing to meet friends that I don’t want to me, not agreeing to dinners I don’t want to attend. It isn’t easy and has rubbed off on a few friends who were used to me never saying no. I’m also trying to bring this to my work life as well, by setting boundaries for myself, not saying yes to everything, instead trying to delegate things and empowering my team to take on more responsibilities.
I’ll keep fighting on, but I still can’t say no. I can say a half yes/no, but still a full no doesn’t come out.